Decoding a guys dating profile isn’t easy, if you have ever used a dating site/app have you ever really read the profiles? I mean properly read and digested them? If you have you will notice a lot of phrases and clichés across them, and then when you chat to the people behind the profiles, maybe even meet them, you will find out what these phrases actually mean. Or to save you the time I have a list on decoding a guys dating profile, or if you are already coupled off then look at all the ‘fun’ you are missing out on.
I have no life. The life I do have is not something I want to broadcast. I am either married or dull. I get up, go to work, come home, have dinner, watch the soaps and then spend the rest of the evening trying to think up ways to lie on my dating profile to make me seem interesting.
Stating the obvious much? Most people’s family are pretty darn important to them, what this means is “I am a mummy’s boy and she rules my life, save yourself now, you will never be good enough and mummy dearest will make your life hell if you so much as dream of a life with me”
I always seem to attract the weirdos or I scare everyone away with my own creepy talk until the point they are forced to block me, which I then take as game playing and messing me around. I will send you stalker style messages at all hours of the day and if you don’t respond within the hour I will assume you have met someone else and bombard you even more. When I am then blocked I will curse your very name and call you a liar and game player.
They are and this person is probably quite the looker himself. If they weren’t why would he feel the need to explain they aren’t. Shoe size isn’t important to me, I don’t feel the need to explain this at every opportunity. Your messages will be ignored because you aren’t quite up to his Barbie doll specifications.
I have whips, chains and a cellar that I converted into a sex room after reading 50 shades of Grey. I will give you the run around, see other people, sleep with you and not call you back, but it’s OK because you’re open minded. The sex will be bland and basic #JustSaying
What are some of your favourite dating profile clichés and do you ever try decoding a guys dating profile?